Last night I went and watched some of my friends' kids. A four-month old named Gabriel, and a 2 year old named Judah. Judah and I played a game where he would stand against the wall, say "ready, set, go!" and then come running, hurling himself toward me for a BIG HUG! It was amazing fun.

Then singing with Elmo, some popcorn, a bath, a story, some milk and then into bed. After Judah was all snug, I could feed Gabriel, and then he and I fell asleep on the couch. I've been doing that a lot lately--falling asleep with babies on the couch.

The night before last was the little foster baby named Joseph. (Incidentally, his foster-parents told me it was the first time little Joseph has slept through the night).

I've been really feeling sorry for myself lately. Relational change is awful, and my best friend just moved to Austin, TX. VERY far away. Her and I shared an apartment--but more than that, we shared a home. She was like an amusement park and a down comforter all rolled into one friend. We talked and talked and talked about everything, and until she left, I never realized how much I didn't feel the need to talk to other people, as long as I had her. But back to my point---I've been feeling sorry for myself lately. Whine, whine, whine... I'm so lonely, my best friend has just left, I'm tired of the roommate switching, I'm not married, I don't have a family, whine... whine...whine. I will whine to my mom and tell her she doesn't understand, because she got married when she was 18 (they're still married by the way), and I would be pregnant with my third child by this point if I were her.

In a separate conversation, she shared to me just how lonely she would get sometimes being a mom. We lived out in the country. She said she would go to town a lot, just so she didn't have to be alone; and, you have to understand that going to town meant me on a backpack, Jake on a front pack, and Tyler on a leash. No small undertaking.

My heart softened.

This morning I had to be extra quiet when I got ready, because my soon to become new roommate, Tara, was sleeping on the couch. She looked very serene snuggled on that big, brown couch, with the vertical blinds clicking with the breeze.

No one will ever be Coop, but maybe new roommates won't be so bad after all. But then again, maybe I'm just experiencing a case of "It's Friday, and pay-day, and therefore everything is shaded a little better." ;)

Lord how I love writing in this thing.

Love, Trace